So it has happened. I’ve said it… ‘Give me the newborn days back…’ Toddlerdom just isn’t for me. In Dragon’s Den style if this is what I’ve got to look forward to for the foreseeable then, ‘I’m out.’
New born was HARD. VERY VERY HARD. Reflux, PND and a non sleeping baby made it unbearable at times. But looking back how easy it seems.
The hardest thing about motherhood is the unknown and blind-living that you go through. If you could somehow know what to expect and how long it was likely to last; we could no doubt cope with each horrendous (I mean endearing) stage a little more easily.
I remember reading a post on Facebook about which stage is harder Toddler v Newborn. At the time I was a sleep deprived, walking dead lookalike and couldn’t imagine that motherhood could possibly get anymore challenging. Seething at people dismissing Newborn as ‘easy’ and ‘wishing their toddler was a baby’ again, I actually felt close to violence and metaphorically wanted to hurt these people who were dismissive of what I was finding horrifically hard.
And now I am one of them.
I have uttered the cliches. ‘I miss the days when she was still.’ When she would lie in my arms for hours and sleep.When she needed me for everything.
Now I have a demanding, headstrong, intelligent and wilful toddler on my hands. She knows her own mind and she knows how to tell me! She has been talking since she was about 15 months and now at 20 months she is pretty fluent and very able to string little sentences together to make herself very clear. Every day she seems to wake up with more vocabulary pouring out of her and her understanding astounds me. Of course she is a big fan of ‘No’ and now likes to use that with gusto.
She astounds me every day with her rhymes, singing and requests. But sometimes I wonder if it is a blessing or a curse. Today she demanded I get her milk that she’d left upstairs. ‘Mummy milk upstairs.’ Wow. She remembered where she’d left if and was able to tell me!
She entertains me in equal measure to annoying me and I love our time together. ‘Hiya Mummy’ and planting a kiss on my lips makes all the horrors disappear. But my God if this is the way it’s going I’m going to need some serious wine!
A friend on Facebook said today… ‘after the terrible twos comes the Threenager stage… brace yourself!’
God help us!